


Boot-Ed

by BarthVader



Series: Untitled EEnE/FNV Crossover [2]
Category: Ed Edd n Eddy, Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Action, Breaking the Fourth Wall, Comedy, Gen, Lasers, Non-Graphic Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-26
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:28:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23330005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BarthVader/pseuds/BarthVader
Summary: A prologue story in which three Freesiders and three Great Khans end up helping each other and talking politics.cover by wr3h
Series: Untitled EEnE/FNV Crossover [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1677733
Kudos: 3





	1. The First Half

“Are we there yet?”

Eddy growled. “No, Lumpy, it’s a bit further.” He pointed at something visible in a distance. “Ya see that old road bridge?”

“Uh huh.”

“It’s south of that.”

“I am concerned, Eddy.” Edd nervously looked around. “We are a long distance away from a safe haven.”

“Ya really think there’s a safe spot anywhere in the Mojave?”

“Freeside is a familiar brand of threat, at the very least. And you have yet to explain your current scheme.”

“If I explained it earlier, you’d be all like ‘oh jeez, it’s a stupid idea, Eddy’.”

“Because most of your ideas are half-baked at best!”

“See, _that’s_ what I’m talking about!”

“Less argue and more exposition?” Ed asked.

“Yeah, yeah. So, there used to be an NCR base in Searchlight.”

“Yes, it’s -used to?”

“Yes. The Legion dirty-bombed it. The place’s irradiated to high hell.”

“Bastards.” the big guy spat.

“I concur.”

“Whoever could have run, did,” Eddy continued, “and they’ve left all their stuff behind. And this is where we come in.” He put his arm around his large friend’s shoulder. “Well, this is where Monobrow comes in. He gets in, grabs anything valuable he can carry, gets out, and we sell it in Novac or Nipton. He’s like a super mutant already, a few rads won’t faze ‘im.”

“What about any hazardous wildlife that could've moved in? Or ghoulified remains of soldiers that didn't evacuate in time?”

Ed looked at him quizzically. “I, uh, punch them?”

“Sounds... reasonable, I suppose.” Edd sighed. “But Ed, if you somehow get severely wounded, or if you begin to feel weak because of radiation, retreat immediately.”

He saluted. “Right-o, Mister Doctor Double D!”

“I don’t think he’ll have to,” Eddy said, “but hey, no scavenge’s worth more than your own hi-”

He paused, as someone has appeared on the top of a hill next to the road, and then promptly tumbled back down, ending up in a heap right in front of the Freesiders.

The person was a woman, not older than them, and with no faction or gang colors on herself. Her face was hidden by her messy long blonde hair. She moved it away, unholstered a scoped trail carbine, and pointed it towards where she had been a moment ago in one swift motion. It _almost_ looked like she didn’t trip while escaping and tried to salvage the situation.

“Um...”

“Retribution!” A Legionary appeared where the girl was standing, and then tumbled down, with a .44 bullet in his brain. His corpse landed in front of the Follower, who was less than thrilled with this turn of events.

“Don’t tell me you’re bothered by a dead guy.” the girl announced

“Our approach to conflict resolution is more...” Edd explained, as Ed moved the corpse out of his sight with as much tact as you’d expect. “...Rincewindian than Ridcullian.”

“Huh?”

“We run away a lot.” Eddy translated. “What’s your name and story, girl?”

“Um, that’s May. And she’s-” Ed began, but the ringleader stopped him.

“Lumpy, this is a different universe, we don’t know each other yet! Read the, uh,” he glanced up, “second world of the description.”

“Pro-lo-goo-eh. Uh, prologue. Sorry.” He helped the girl up. “So, what’s your name, May?”

The other two rolled their eyes.

“And you?” May responded. “This is Mojave, you might pop a cap in me for my colors.”

“We’re Freesiders. Name’s Eddy.” Eddy turned around and pointed at the emblem on his leather jacket. “I’m with the Kings, the big guy’s Ed and he’s between jobs, and the thin guy, Double D, is-”

“...a Follower, I recognize the labcoat.” 

“And you’re a…?”

“I’m a courier. I was transporting a package with my sisters when a Legion patrol ambushed us.” She raised her trail carbine. “I couldn’t do much with a long-range firearm, so I… retreated.”

“Ran away and left your family behind.”

“Eddy!”

“I’ll wait until the night and get them out. They’re tough, they’ll survive a few hours.” Noticing the expressions on the Eds’ faces, she added, “C’mon, what’s the worst thing that could happen to them?” The King answered. A look of horror slowly creeped on May’s face. “You- you’re messing with me.”

“I wish.”

“As far as I know, this is standard Legion protocol.” Edd confirmed.

“...I can’t do this sober.” She pulled out a worn-out inhaler and huffed something from it. “ _Whoa._ Alright, I’ve gotta find a vantage point and pick ‘em out one by one. Unless y’all have a better plan.”

The King scanned the surroundings for an inspiration and his eyes landed on the Legionary’s corpse. “Yeeeeah, we do. For a symbolic payment.”

“Eddy, I am positive that demanding payment from someone in such situation is unethical at best.”

“That’s why I said “symbolic”, Bleeding Sock.”

She put the inhaler back in her pocket. “I’ve got a few hundred NCR bucks on me. I’ll pay ya when you get my sisters free.” She put her carbine in the holster on her back. “I’m gonna look for a sniper spot, as a Plan B. If I see ya not die, we’re meeting under the road bridge.”

“See ya there then.” Eddy waved her away, then turned to his friend. “Sockhead, you go and find a hiding place. This is a two-man con.”

* * *

The Legion raid camp was relatively well-established. A few small tents for troops to sleep in, a big one, holding all the supplies, a campfire in the middle of it, and a few thick planks used as benches, and some decaying heads on pikes to tie the place together.

A decanus and two rank-and-file recruits were standing guard, watching the two captured slaves tied back-to-back next to the campfire - a well-built redhead with messy curly hair, and her skinny blue-haired sister, with a fringe covering her right eye. The damages on both suggested they hadn’t gone gentle.

“A-weh.” 

The silence was broken by someone approaching the camp in an ever-so-slightly undersized armor-

“Not my fault those pricks are underfed.” Eddy growled at the narrator. 

-and a big guy in tattered clothes following him behind. 

“Who are you?” the decanus asked, as one of the legionaries raised his spear.

“Put the poking stick down. I am… Eduardus of Arizona” the King fibbed. “And this is Obelus, a slave. We were sent by the higher-ups downriver.”

“By _who,_ exactly?”

Eddy mustered all of his courage and stared him in the eyes. “No time for this. I’ve got a tip from our spies that there’s an NCR sniper in the town up north with a real chip on his shoulder.”

The decanus scoffed. “What can a single man do to us?”

“I dunno, you can go and ask the raiders, or our men from Nelson that tried to get ‘im.” A pause. “Oh wait, ya can’t, ‘cause he _shot them in their dumb faces before they noticed!_ ”

“And what do,” cue air quotes, “ _the higher-ups_ expect us to do?” 

“First, we ship the slaves. Then, we move the camp further south.”

The hand of the decanus slowly moved towards the worn-out .44 on his hip. “Why the slaves first?”

“Uh, ‘cause y- we are expected to fight and die for Ceasar, and the slaves are just dead weights in combat?” he said, in a tone suggesting the other guy’s an idiot for even asking the question. 

“Hey, if ya untie me, I can show ya how good at combat I am” the redhead snarked. The spear-wielding legionary kicked her in the side.

“Also, they could get killed in the shootout, wasting time and effort we spent on capturing them.” the King finished.

“I’ll walk with you then.” The other Legionary got up. “Letting one man escort three slaves is asking for trouble.”

“No worries.” Eddy pointed at ‘Obelus’. “This guy over here’s totally dedicated to the Legion, he’ll help me wrangle the other two. Right, big guy?”

“Aye-aye!” He clicked his heels and saluted with his left hand. “Heil tovarisch See-zar!”

“He’s got the spirit, at least.”

“Enough of this farce.” The decanus unholstered and cocked his gun. “Does the NCR really believe we will not be able to spot such obvious spies?”

“Me? With the NCR?” Eddy felt cold sweat on his back. “What’s Latin for ‘absurd’?”

Then, a crack of a fired laser pistol. A red line went above everyone’s heads, connecting with the face of a fourth legionary, who the other two Eds failed to notice, and who was standing over the equally oblivious tunnel-visioned sniper with his machete out. The man’s body glowed red for a moment before crumbling to dust.

“And the word you wanted is _ridiculus_!”

Eddy turned to the Follower, tucked behind a tent. “Sockhead, I told ya to hide!”

“Trust me, I’d prefer to do so!”

Before the decanus could process what was happening, May started implementing Plan B, and everything above his neck became a fine red mist.

“Lumpy, cover!” Eddy hid behind his more bulletproof friend and pulled out his own gun, a silenced 12.7 mm pistol. He peeked from behind Ed’s back to try and aim in the Legionaries’ vague direction, and then he spotted the redhead charging towards the spear-wielding one. One stab to the throat later, he wasn’t a problem. The King turned his attention to the third Legion member and noticed the blue-haired girl aiming the decanus’s revolver at him. She kept shooting until the hammer struck an empty chamber a few times.

For whatever reason, Eddy didn’t feel comfortable enough to put his gun away.

“You.” the redhead pointed the bloodied knife at the two. “Who are ya with?”

“H-how did you get out?” Ed asked. “W-where did the knife come from?”

“Improved holdout. Answer the question.”

“They’re with me, Lee.” May walked down from the her sniper spot towards them. “They offered to help me get y’all out.”

“Really? I’m glad an’ all,” Lee put the knife away, “but we would’ve gotten out ourselves.”

“Oh really?” Eddy protested. “If my man didn’t take down that fourth guy, the blonde would’ve been a shishkebab!” Pause. “Wait, where is he?”

The five peeked behind the tent and noticed the Follower leaning against it, breathing heavily. His hands were trembling.

“You alright?” Marie asked.

“Wait, we didn’t introduce-”

“We all know who I am, let’s skip that part.”

“I-I-I-” Edd started.

May pulled out an inhaler and offered it to him. “You want a hit?”

The idea of an extensively used inhaler getting close to his mouth was enough for the Follower to get his bearings together. “No, thanks. I just… I-I a-abhor lethal measures. Unless the situation is d-dire, I would r-rather run or hide than take away someone’s life.”

Lee crossed her arms. “Even if they’re a bunch of creepy raiders enslaving people?” 

“Yes.” Edd sighed, twiddling his thumbs. “I u-understand that violence can be the only option in situations like this one, but I would rather not be the one pulling the trigger.”

“So,” the blue-haired girl piped in, “if I told ya we’re Great Khans, you won’t try and shoot us?”

All the uneasiness and disgust on Edd’s face was replaced by fury. “You are _WHAT_?!”

Eddy glanced at him. “Is that personal?”

Ed glanced at the fourth wall. “Was this crossover just an excuse to call Lee, May and Marie ‘Khankers’?”

Yes, but that’s not the point. The Follower got up and angrily dusted himself off. “The entire… the whole bloody drug-running operation that the Great Khans have going on stems from the knowledge that _the Followers of the Apocalypse have provided, you degenerates!_ ”

Marie shrugged. “You do what you gotta do to get by.”

“ _THAT IS NOT AN EXCUSE, YOU ACCURSED DRUG MULES!_ ”

“Can ya insult us more quietly, please?” Lee demanded, before turning to the King. “What did May offer ya for your help?”

“A few hundred NCR bucks. Like, really symbolic, ‘cause I didn’t want to work for free but didn’t wanna leave ya on Legion’s mercy either.”

“Let’s make it five hundred.” She reached in her pocket and pulled out five banknotes. “On top of that, we split the loot from the camp fifty-fifty, _and,_ as a personal favor, we escort ya back to Freeside. Y’all live in Freeside, yes?” The boys nodded.

“Why?” the middle Khanker protested. “We would’ve gotten out on our own without them!”

“Because those three guys stuck their neck out for us for chump change. Ya gotta encourage this behaviour.” She glanced at Edd. “Also, a guy that hates killing in the year 2281 is, like, an endangered species.”

“Also, again, I’d be shishkebab’d.” May added.

“Weren’t we supposed to go to that NCR camp?” Ed asked the King.

Eddy glanced at the still-shaken Follower. “Maybe another time. We’re still alive, we’ve got a profit, let’s grab whatever’s valuable and go home.”

“Dibs on the revolver!” Marie shouted.


	2. The Second Half

The six were marching north up what used to be the I-93, with the loot from the Legion camp packed into Ed’s green jacket.

“How did ya end up so far from your turf?” Eddy broke the silence.

“We wanted to scout out Nipton, we’ve heard there might be some potential customers there,” May replied. “Legion caught us by the crossroads, I ran off to try and pick them off from afar, and you know the rest.”

“This’ll sound like a bad dialogue option, but what’s your take on them?” Lee asked.

“Bastards,” Ed echoed his previous sentiment.

“You got a good glimpse of them already,” Eddy added.

“Maybe we just saw the bad apples,” she pushed on. “The Khans beat you half to death as a rite of passage, but they’re otherwise alright.”

Edd just glared at her. “Definitions of ‘alright’ aside, are you three living under a rock?”

“ _ On _ a rock,” May interjected. “Red Rock, specifically” She rubbed her chin. “Though maybe we could mine out bunkers or something...”

“Ya got me, black hat,” the Khan ringleader admitted, in a slightly obnoxious tone. “We mostly trade with folks around New Vegas and do not follow the Mojave power struggles as well as you do, so please, Mr Up-To-Date, enlighten us. Deliver some exposition.”

Edd inhaled. “The abridged version: Ceasar’s Legion is an autocratic technophobic bundle of eighty-seven assimilated tribes, led by a megalomaniac that named himself after an ancient Roman general and dictator. After running out of lands to pillage east of the Colorado river, he set his sights on what used to be Nevada.” Inhale. “A cannibalistic, slave-trading, technology-shunning horde, whose approach to women’s rights I cannot describe without the relatively light-hearted tone of this fanfiction  _ taking a bloody nosedive _ .”

“They’re also really hard on raiders, so you’re in double doo-doo,” the King added, reaching to Ed’s jacket and pulling out a Sunset Sarsaparilla and a bottle opener. “And they play dirty, we can turn around and show you what they did to Searchlight.”

“They can’t be worse than the NCR.”

The bottle cap sprung up and landed on the ground with a soft clink, as the three Eds stared gormlessly at the girls, expecting that to be a bad joke.

“...you  _ cannot _ be serious,” Eddy finally blurted out.

“Dead serious.”

He took a gulp. “Is that about the Sour Basin thing?”

“ _ Bitter Springs,  _ motherfucker.” The ringleader stopped (and so did the entire column) and turned towards him. “And the ‘thing’ was a  _ massacre of unarmed civilians. _ ” 

Noticing the shift in Lee’s tone, and the other two’s fists balling up, the King raised his hands. “Sorry, sorry. Didn’t mean to strike a nerve.”

She grabbed him by the collar and stared him in the eye. “Have you ever stared down multiple .308 barrels, with nowhere to run, and with the bastards on the other end firing until they run out of ammo?  _ HAVE YOU?! _ ”

“Maybe?” Eddy shrugged. “I mean, I pissed off a Great Khan once, that’s gotta be something comparable.”

“Can I interject?”

“No you cannot,” Lee spat, before realizing the voice didn’t belong to anyone of the remaining five. She turned in that direction and realized there was an NCR Ranger staring at them, clad in patrol armor and with a revolver on his hip. He seemed relatively nonthreatening, but the girls took a step backward and reached for their weapons.

Eddy gave Ed a nudge, and he firmly grabbed the wrists of Lee and Marie, in a way that almost went unnoticed by the ranger. Edd leaned towards the remaining Kanker and whispered in her ear, “Let us talk our way out of this, please.”

The King stepped forward. “Is there a problem, Mr...”

“Ranger Beaumont,” he introduced himself. “ I’m from the station down south, you must’ve walked past it earlier. And, well, there is no problem. You all-but-admitted you’re Great Khans, bu-”

Lee and Marie tried to struggle, but Ed wouldn’t budge. “Actually, only the women are Khans,” Edd piped up. “We just happened to-”

“Let. Me. Talk.” Eddy tried to calm them down before turning back to Beaumont. “That proves nothing. Lots of people in poor parts of Vegas have... strong opinions on Bitter Springs.”

“Do they talk about it like they were there?”

“She could’ve been a travelling merchant. The Khans might’ve needed to buy some stuff they couldn’t make themselves.”

“As far as I know, they weren’t back when Springs happened. They were just raiding caravans to survive, and only recently branched into chems.”

“Why won’t ya just shoot us and go on your fucking merry way then?!” Lee spat. 

“I never wanted to,” Beaumont replied. “I just stepped in ‘cause it looked like the leather jacket dude was in trouble.”

“Naaaah.” Eddy waved him off. “I tried to bluff a Legion squad earlier today,  _ that  _ was trouble!”

“Really?” Beaumont gave him an amused stare. “Less than fifteen minutes ago a ranger has radioed in about a massacred and looted Legion raid camp down south. You know something about that?”

“That’s on the gals,” the King smirked, pointing towards the group. “And my Follower buddy with a laser gun over here.”

“The report mentioned one disintegrated Legionary... do you have more proof of your involvement?” 

“More proof, you say?” Eddy took a few steps backwards, towards Ed, and reached in his jacket’s pocket. “Here’s some gold coins we looted… some healing powder...” he listed, emptying it, “a machete… another one… a bundle of throwing spears...” The pile at his feet was getting larger. “One more machete… decanus armor...”

“Fine, fine, I believe ya.” The ranger smirked. “Three gals and one laser gun toting Follower giving the Legion what for… That’s just golden.”

“So, can we go ahead?”

“Yeah, sure.” Beaumont stepped aside. “Khans or no Khans, if you wanna shoot some more Legion pricks down the road, be my guest.”

“We just might.” Lee turned to Ed. “Can you let us go now, big guy?”

Ed glanced at Eddy, who nodded. He let go of the girls, and while Lee remained still, Marie unholstered her gun and attempted to aim at the ranger. Before she could do that, Eddy slung a half-full bottle of Sass at her. It smacked her in the face, giving Ed an opening to yank the gun out of her hand.

“You will get it after class.” he said, putting it in his jacket and beginning to shovel the loot pile back in there.

“Note we ain’t doing anything.” Lee raised her hands a bit, and her youngest sister followed. 

“Huh, so you  _ do  _ have this under control after all,” Beaumont raised an eyebrow, putting his hand on the gun on his hip. “Since she’s outvoted and disarmed, I’ll let that incident slide. Now, scram.”

Eddy checked if Ed collected all the loot from the ground, and then gestured at the group to move out. And then they did, rather promptly. As soon as the ranger was out of sight and hearing range, the King turned to the middle Khan. “What the heck was that?”

“Watch your mouth, Ten of Spades.” Lee marched up to his other side. “She did a stupid thing, but I ain’t gonna let you push her around.”

“Alright then.” Eddy thought for a moment how to tackle that, before turning back to Ed, trotting behind the three. “Lumpy, get us all some water.” The big guy fished out five bottles of purified water and tossed them towards the rest of the group, then opened a sixth for himself. “I get it. I really do.” Eddy took a sip. “You don’t trust the NCR. And I can get why - Bitter Springs aside-”

“That’s a big ‘aside’.”

“-they’re a bunch of overextending imperialist bastards. But!” he pointed at the sky. “There’s a line between NCR the country and NCR the people. NCR the country will push you aside to get whatever they want.”

“As opposed to the Legion, who will pave the road with your corpses,” Edd muttered.

“Fair point, Sockhead. And on top of that, NCR the  _ people  _ are here ‘cause they have to, ‘cause the bigwigs back in Cali told them they want the dam, the power and the water” the King went on. “They can be bargained with. They can be reasoned with. They feel pity, and remorse, and fear. And if that fails, you can try and bribe ‘em. You’ve seen it for yourself. I’m not saying you should  _ trust  _ them, but you don’t have to shoot them on sight, and I can’t say the same thing about the Legion,” he finished. 

“Question.” Lee raised her hand. 

“Yeah?”

“How on earth is that water still cold?”

In response, Ed pulled out a full-sized refrigerator from his jacket, complete with a cord going from it back to the pocket.

“How did  _ that  _ get in there?” Marie asked in disbelief.

“Double D fixed it up for me!” Ed replied, and the girls decided asking further questions is pointless.

“You’re a colorful bunch, y’know that?” the Khan ringleader said. “I’d love to get to know ya a bit more.”

“How about  _ no _ ?” Edd muttered, with unusual viciousness.

“Chill, Sockhead. They won’t dare to pull anything off.”

“Oh, really?” Marie taunted

“Mr Do No Harm over here disintegrated a Legionary with a single pew pew,” he retorted. “And he’s the  _ least _ dangerous of us.” He glanced at Lee. “Sorry if I crossed a line.”

“I’ll let it slide this time. And truth be told, I kinda wanna see you going all-out in a fight.”

The group was approaching Novac. “Alright, there’s a shop up ahead” Eddy expositioned. “We can go and sell the loot.”

“And then we’ll need to think about setting camp somewhere.” May added. “It’s getting late, and I don’t wanna stumble upon a raider camp at night.”

Edd visibly twitched, trying to stop himself from making a bitter remark. 

“You wanted to add something, smart guy?” Lee asked.

“No. I am going to go ahead and try to make some errands while you sell off the spoils.”

“‘Kay,” Eddy said, “meet us near the motel gate when you’re done.” 

The redhead glanced at May “Go with him.”

“Why her and not me?” Marie protested.

“‘Cause I don’t want him to be alone, and I can trust her to not point a gun at someone when not needed.”

* * *

The loot was sold without any issues worth mentioning, other than Lee personally splitting the caps on the stairs of the gift shop to make sure they’re evenly divided between the two groups.

“One-twenty, could you stop leering at the money? One-twenty-five…”

“I'm just making sure you're not trying to skim us” Eddy replied. “I could count them after you’re done-”

“No, you can’t!” Marie burst out. “I don’t wanna sit on the stairs all day!”

“Okay the-”

He was interrupted by a blaring, continuous tone, coming from near the motel office. 

“What in the one-fifty...”

The group noticed the gate being opened, and what looked like a pre-War car with the roof removed rolled into the courtyard, with Edd behind the steering wheel and May sitting in the lidless trunk. 

“I’ve acquired transportation” Edd flashed a proud grin. “It won’t hold together for long, but should be enough to get us to Freeside and the ladies to Red Rock.”

“Great job, Double D!” Ed clapped in glee.

“Wu- how?” Marie’s jaw was on the floor.

“He got some parts from the junkyard nearby, wired some energy cells to this old wreck, and then did things to it.” May explained. 

“What things?”

The blonde shrugged. “Heck if I know. I’m a chem gal, not an engineer.”

“And what was that sound?” Lee asked, too focused on the caps to be impressed. “One-seventy...”

“A car horn.” The Follower tapped a button on the wheel and a shorter version of the sound blared out. 

“You know what, fuck exactness.” The redhead put all the caps in a big pile, and then split it into two more-or-less even parts and shoved one towards the King. “Here’s your cut, let’s get on that thing and get back home.”

They both collected the money and got on board, with Eddy being the slowest and having to share the trunk space with May. Edd did a Y-turn and left the motel grounds, then turned into the old motorway, keeping a speed of about twenty-five miles per hour. “The ride will be bumpy, on account of the road being unmaintained since 2077.”

“Who gives a crap?” Marie said. “We won’t march our soles off and that’s  _ awesome _ !”

Taken aback by genuine praise from a Khan, Edd blushed. 

“This is a weird day, ya know...” Lee said, in an uncharacteristically somber tone. “I started it captured by Legionaries, and end it free and speeding along on an old highway with a guy that told me our sworn enemies are lesser of two evils.”

“It’s Vegas, baby,” Eddy chuckled. “Fortunes change in the blink of an eye.”

“Call me ‘baby’ one more time and I’ll hit you.”

“Sorry.”

“But other than that, I’m really grateful for all ya did.” She turned to the King. “And I really meant that thing about gettin’ to know each other. There’s a bar in Freeside, yes? We could get drunk together and talk about shit.”

“If Monobrow and Sockhead don’t mind...”

Marie glanced at Edd. “C’mon, it’s your turf, we’ll have to play nice.”

“Fair point.”

Ed just shrugged in response. “Yeah, let’s do that sometime.”

“That’s set then, we’re getting drunk!” May cheered.

“If I can interrupt...” the Follower pressed the gas pedal a little harder, noticing a bunch of raiders hiding behind a billboard. A few inaccurate bullets whizzed past them. “Since we’re in a vehicle, it would make more sense to drop the ladies off, and then head towards Freeside. Where should we leave you?”

“Just drive, I’ll tell ya where to turn.” Lee commanded.

* * *

It was getting dark, and to Edd’s relief, one headlight was still in working condition. The car was approaching the eastern entrance to the Red Rock Canyon.

“Can you walk from here?” the driver asked. “I’m running low on energy and don’t want to draw attention of your comrades.”

“Yeah, sure. We know that path well enough” 

The girls got out of the vehicle. You could just barely make out the characteristic iron-oxide-tinted formations. Ed fished out a revolver from his jacket and handed it back to Marie.

“Remember, we agreed to get drunk!” May shouted.

“And a goodbye to you too.” Eddy jumped from the trunk to the back seat. 

“See ya!” Ed waved.

The car took off, leaving the Khans alone. After a moment to let their eyes adjust to the dark, they marched towards the camp.

Most people were too busy with their own lives to pay attention to them. They walked in silence, thinking about all the experiences of the day, and what the Freesiders had told them.

_ A cannibalistic, slave-trading, technology-shunning horde, whose approach to women’s rights I cannot describe without the relatively light-hearted tone of this fanfiction  _ taking a bloody nosedive.

“Ave.”

The girls raised her head and noticed the Legion frumentarius, standing in front of Papa Khan’s house. He appeared in the canyon some time ago, forging an alliance with the Legion against the NCR. Most folks, including the Khankers themselves at the time, were all too eager to get some revenge on the Bear.

_ I’m not saying you should  _ trust  _ them, but you don’t have to shoot them on sight, and I can’t say the same thing about the Legion. _

“Evenin’.” Lee muttered.

“Is there something wrong? You look a bit down.”

_ Bastards. _

“Absolutely not.” she replied. “We’re just tired and going back to our tent. C’mon, girls.”

The three promptly marched away, not daring to make any comments in the Legionary’s vicinity. They entered their tent and sat down on their beddings. May quietly asked, “So, what do we do now?”

Lee took a moment to think about a suitable answer. “I have no clue.”


End file.
